Introduction to College Writing

An email arrived this morning from a student in my ENG 203 class:
hey dr pratt this is h------- and i was currently working on my project for the class discussion for next wed november 11th and was just kind of confused wat your are looking for. I noe i am pose to read the story and explain what the story is about but the rest im a bit confuse for example the 7 minutes of criticism and 7 min of close readings and discussion question. I appreciate your help becasue im not trying to do bad on this assignment thank u.
I replied,

For the criticism part of the assignment, you need to find three scholarly articles related to your author. To do that, start at the library homepage, click "Databases, Articles, Etc.," then click the third option after the link, "Academic Search Premier." Once you're on that page, look about halfway down and find the boxes that say "Full Text" and "Scholarly (Peer Reviewed) Journals." Click both of those boxes before you search for your author or story. Read the articles, and summarize them briefly during your presentation. That should take seven minutes of your presentation.

For the explication -- choose an excerpt (a paragraph from a story or a short poem or a section from a longer poem) by your author and write a close analysis (~250 words) of that text. Focus on the language choices and meaning of the section. If you read this aloud as part of your presentation, and take a couple of questions, that'll take up another 7 minutes.

Best of luck,

Dr. Pratt
I don't know why this exchange makes me laugh so much, but I've been laughing at it all day. The absurdity of it! I hope someone somewhere is keeping a record of it.


Mark said...

k thx! by!!!

Insignificant Wrangler said...

Document the fantasy.

Monica said...

Oh how I love this. The student writes with such earnestness, though...it's tragic. It kind of reminds me of one of the comments one of my students left about me on RateMyProfessor.Com: "So smokin hot is ridiculous." Should I be flattered by the compliment regarding my appearance, or horrified by the audacity of one of my students, flaunting his (presumably it's a he) bad grammar, bad grammar that my course did not correct?

Casey said...

Compliment, Monica! Grammar is so passé.